China’s new three-child policy gives birth to ironic jokes on social media · Global Voices
Oiwan Lam

Image from the Stand News. Used with permission.
If people won't have two children, will they consider having three?
China has decided to relax its two-child policy to a three-child policy after the country saw a steep decline in the birth rate in the 2020 census. The move has been greeted by a wave of ironic commentary on social media platforms.
China's controversial “one-child policy” was enforced from 1980 but was eased in 2015 as the government anticipated problems supporting an ageing population.
While the shift to a two-child policy initially lifted the number of births from 16.55 million in 2015 to 17.86 million in 2016, this trend was not sustained.
Since then, China’s birth rate has declined. In 2020, just 12 million babies were born.
The decision to introduce a new third-child policy was made on May 31 at China’s Politburo Committee, overseen by President Xi Jinping. It was presented to the public in lieu of Children’s Day on June 1.
The policy was introduced with a package of supporting measures – restrictions on marriage dowries, protections for women's employment rights, maternity leave improvements and insurance, taxation and housing benefits.
Nevertheless, a poll posted by state-owned Xinhua News on Weibo, saw 90 percent of respondents indicate that they would not consider having a third child:
Screen capture of Xinhua's deleted poll
The now-deleted poll attracted more than 2,000,000 responses.
Many asked the question: is the state going to pay child-rearing expenses?
Public sentiment was summed up in @littlecrazyca’s comment on Twitter:
一早起来，看到三孩政策的消息满屏飞。就在想：全世界没有哪一个国家，分文不出，几十年在女人的子宫口开会，说开就开，说闭就闭。曾经是逼着做绝育，甚至罚款单位开除什么的，现在又让你生仨，简直了！以前的罚款是不是给人家退了，该恢复什么都给人恢复了呢？
— 西小疯? (@littlecrazyca) May 31, 2021
My mobile phone screen is flooded with news about the third child policy this morning. I don’t think anywhere else in this world can order a woman's uterus to function through decades of policy meetings rather than incentives. In the past, women were forced to sterilize or they would have to pay a fine and be dismissed by their work unit. Now they want you to raise three [children]! Are you going to reimburse them or give them back their jobs now?
As serious online criticism of state policy can be censored or even punished, dark humor reigned.
Some speculated on the burden that three children would place on couples from the single-child generation born in the 1980s and 1990s, who have no siblings to help them look after their parents.
哈哈哈哈哈，80﹑90後，獨生子女這兩代人，一對夫妻養4個老人，再拉扯3孩子。然後幹到65歲，還沒領上退休金，就挂了…
Hahahaha, for the single-child generations who were born in the 1980s and 1990s, a married-couple would have to feed 4 elderly parents and 3 kids. They would have to work until 65. By the time they could get their pensions, they would be dead…
Other netizens called such a life model “the life of garlic chives”, in reference to a popular online meme depicting ordinary Chinese as exploited by a political and economic system premised on rent-seeking.
One viral post on Weibo that this author republished on Twitter mocked: “I wish you a long life so that you have to take care of nine grandchildren at the age of 65.”
pic.twitter.com/9OJVskLw7z
— oiwan (@oiwan) June 1, 2021
The policy’s socioeconomic implications for women also earned a lot of attention.
國家提倡生三胎
醫院又提倡順產和母乳喂養
專家建議孩子不要讓老年人帶
孩子渴望媽媽隨時陪伴
老公又希望媳婦貌美女花也能賺錢養家
公婆希望兒媳婦照顧好老公教育好孩子
社會又提倡女人要經濟獨立
一個女人，竟要她活成千軍萬馬…
The state advocates for three children
The hospitals suggest natural labour and breastfeeding
Experts advise that elderly people should not take care of kids
Kids want their mother to be available all the time
Husbands expect wives to keep looking pretty and shoulder the family burden
Parents-in-law expect their daughters-in-law to take care of their husbands and educate their grandchildren
Society encourages women to have economic independence
A woman is like a solider in a battlefield …
#三孩生育政策来了#三胎必然深化女性职场歧视，试想下一个企业会期望女的放三次产假么？虽然愿意生三胎的是少数，但受歧视的将会是整个女性群体。要么就男的陪产假和女性等长，不然女性三胎如何解决职场歧视，你不建议或者不推荐都没用，因为用不用是企业的事，你如何限制？ ​
#Three child policy has come# Three children will definitely strengthen discrimination in employment. Will corporations now expect female staff to take three maternity leaves?  Though only a minority of women will choose to give birth to three children, all women will be discriminated against. Unless men’s parental leave is made equal with that of women, the problem of employment discrimination will not be solved. Employment decisions are made internally within corporations. How would we intervene?
#三孩生育政策来了#国家这是要把女性往死里整呐…看了个分析如果一个女孩儿遵循国家的政策来，基本上她自己的人生从结婚那天就结束了，一直到50多岁才能有空做自己，我的建议是不结婚不生，先把自己活明白了。
#Three child policy has come# The state is pushing women to the edge… just read an analysis, if a woman has to follow the policy, from the date when she gets married, she has to [serve the family] until she reaches 50, then she has time to become herself. My suggestion is not to get married and not to give birth. Just figure out what you want first.
Some tried to apply the logic of the policy to other real life situations:
A: 我沒錢吃飯
B: 沒事，我們餐廳現在延長營業時間了
A: 我說我沒錢吃飯！
B: 你要是不滿意的話，我們也可以24h 營業
A: 我 tm 說我沒錢吃飯！！
A: I don’t have money to buy a meal.
B: It’s OK, our restaurant has extended our opening hours.
A: I said I don’t have money to buy a meal!
B: If you are not satisfied, we can extend our opening times to 24 hours!
A: I f**king said I don’t have money to buy a meal !!
在我們老家，豬如果不下崽兒了，養豬的老會去看看到底是哪裡出了問題，是豬圈不夠大﹑衛生條件差還是豬壓力太大了，導致杏玉下降了，找到問題了解決問題，豬自然就下崽兒了，沒有成天下文件給豬看一直逼著豬下崽兒的。
Back in our villages, if the sows did not bear piglets, the farmers would find out what were the problems – whether the farm was too small, the hygiene was too bad or the sows were under too much pressure. Once you attended to these problems, the sows would give birth to piglets. Nobody would hand down a document to force the sows to give birth.
Some netizens fretted that more coercive government policies might emerge if the three-child policy failed to stimulate population growth:
單身稅的日子盼著盼著就近了。
It seems that the day a single-people tax will be introduced is getting closer