Classic Christmas Carols, Satirically Reimagined as Songs About Hong Kong Politics · Global Voices
Oiwan Lam

Screenshot from Emilia Wong's video.
A set of Christmas Songs has gone viral on Hong Kong social media during the holiday season.
Shared more than 1,470 times and viewed more than 190,000 times, the songs are no ordinary Christmas carols. The lyrics are rewritten with wit to capture major social and political sagas that have played out recently in Hong Kong.
The singer is Emilia Wong, a local university student whose Facebook page’s banner says, “I am a Hong Konger, and I advocate Hong Kong independence.” That's a bold statement aimed at Chinese authorities, who have vowed to quash an independence movement in Hong Kong, which is a special administrative region of the mainland.
The songs were published as a collection called “Hong Konger, Merry Christmas” and composed of five popular Christmas tunes: Jingle Bells, Silent Night, We Wish You a Merry Christmas, Twelve Days of Christmas and Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer. Full of dark humor, these five songs offer a somewhat lighthearted roundup of what happened in Hong Kong in 2016.
The first song is a reimagined version of Jingle Bells. Instead of lyrics that speak of a fun ride in a one-horse open sleigh through the snow, it talks about the politics of land development in Hong Kong surrounding the Wang Chau housing controversy.
The government promised to build 17,000 public housing units at Wang Chau in Hong Kong's New Territories in 2012. The piece of land is currently a huge temporary parking area for containers and vehicles operated by rural elites and members of triad, or organized crime, organizations.
Then, the city's Chief Executive Leung Chung Ying conducted off-the-record “soft lobbying” with the rural communities. Afterward, the government’s development plan was downsized to 4,000 public housing units while the rest of the land was destined to the construction of private apartments and rural small house units. While it is unusual for the chief executive to lead a development lobby, some suspected that the change of plan was made in exchange for the rural communities’ support in the upcoming chief executive election.
In fact, under the new plan, the government will have to build all the infrastructure for the private developers in the name of the 4,000 public housing units. It was later revealed that the government and a private developer shared a consulting firm, which leaked confidential government information to the private party in Wang Chau’s development plan.
In past years, the Hong Kong government has said there is no land left to build more housing, and therefore wants to exploit public areas and country parks for development purposes. But the Wang Chau controversy revealed that the government would rather harm public interest than confront the powerful and privileged.
See how the saga is retold to the tune of Jingle Bells:
香港地 香港地 無樓就要起
拆曬你既訓練地 大球場用黎 起
香港地 香港地 無樓就要起
兩百呎你夠住未 住三口無問題
橫洲喺隔籬 而家開發未
唔搞得笪地 鄉紳嬲到死
重新喺隔籬 隨便搵笪地
寧願郊野公園起 香港有地皮
In Hong Kong, in Hong Kong, more apartments are needed
Tear down your football training ground for the buildings
In Hong Kong, in Hong Kong, more apartments are needed
200 square feet can house a three-person family
Wang Chau is just next door and undeveloped
But the land cannot be used as the rural gentry are angry
Look for another piece of land
Country parks have all the lands needed!
The second song, Silent Night, is reworked to talk about not the birth of Jesus, but two Hong Kong lawmakers’ oath-taking controversy.
The two lawmakers, Leung Hung-Hang and Yau Wai-Ching, altered their inauguration oath’s wording, pledging allegiance to “the Hong Kong nation” and calling China “Shina” — a derogatory term used by Japan during the Second World War. The gesture was viewed as a rejection of the oath, which is outlined in Hong Kong's constitution, called the Basic Law. The steering committee of the People's Congress in Beijing stepped in to offer their interpretation of the law and to pressure local courts into disqualifying the two.
Here is the Hong Kong version of Silent Night:
記得發誓 咪宣錯誓 中央係 老細黎
第日返親工要宣下誓 認做中央管理的契弟
為大家好就記低 香港係一個縣黎
記得發誓 咪宣錯誓 搞港獨 咪過黎
第日中央釋法先至弊 大陸嬲嬲豬會死咁滯
入共產黨就最威 香港就包無問題
Remember to take the oath. Don’t make the mistake. The central government is the boss.
In the future, all positions have to take the oath. Commit yourself as the central government’s servile bastard.
For everyone’s sake, remember Hong Kong is just another province.
Remember to take the oath. Don’t make the mistake. Advocates of Hong Kong's independence, get lost.
The reinterpretation of the law is the worst to come. Agitating the central government is preparing your own coffin.
Joining the party will bring you power. All the problems in Hong Kong will then be solved.
The third song, to the music of We Wish You A Merry Christmas, is about the cross-border smuggling controversy. People from mainland China believe that the quality of groceries, foods and drugs sold in Hong Kong are better. To cater to the huge market demand, many people make their living by carrying items by hand from Hong Kong across the border into China to sell them there.
Here are the new lyrics to We Wish You A Merry Christmas:
逢聖誕應該買藥物
逢聖誕應該買禮物
逢聖誕應該走貨物
人民幣邊度夠
平靚正有售 奶粉乜都有
買金莎可以送豬頭 人民幣邊度夠
Christmas is a season to buy drugs
Christmas is a season to buy gifts
Christmas is a season to smuggle
There isn’t enough yuan [for all we wanted.]
Cheap and quality-guaranteed, infant milk powders and other items are here.
Buying chocolates with a pighead souvenir. [In Cantonese culture, pighead is for offering to the ancestor when visiting courtyard.] There isn’t enough yuan [for all we wanted.]
The fourth song is to the tune of Twelve Days of Christmas. It twists the lyrics, which normally speak of the ever increasing number of gifts the subject receives from their true love, to be about five booksellers from Hong Kong who were abducted by mainland police for selling banned books.
The incident has caused a public panic. While the other booksellers were nabbed either in mainland China or aboard, at least one of the booksellers, Lee Bo, was kidnapped in Hong Kong and taken to mainland China. Later, Lee reappeared in Hong Kong, confessed to his crime and claimed that he had voluntarily traveled o mainland China to assist an investigation.
Here are the new lyrics:
銅鑼灣個老細 話佢買左本禁書
即時入冊 即時畫押 即時道歉 仲要送翻去深圳警署
銅鑼灣個老細 話佢買左本禁書
拉埋～八婆
拉埋～阿婆
拉埋～老婆
拍片認錯
交曬佢份糧
封埋鋪
捉佢上羅湖 仲要送翻去深圳警署
Causeway Bay’s boss bought a banned book
He was then arrested, convicted, forced to apologize and escorted to the Shenzhen police station.
Causeway Bay’s boss bought a banned book
They arrested his mistress
They arrested his grandma
They arrested his wife
He made a TV confession
They paid his staff and closed his shop
Escorted him to the Lo Wu [border and sent him to Shenzhen police station [in China].
The fifth song rewritten to the tune of Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer, usually about one of Santa Claus's reindeer, is about the upcoming election for the chief executive, the top government position in Hong Kong.
Currently there are four potential candidates:
1. Regina Ip, a lawmaker and a former top government official responsible for preparing the enactment of a national security law in accordance with article 23 in the Basic Law. She resigned from the government after a huge rally against the legislation in 2003;
2. Woo Kwok-hing, a retired judge whose main agenda for running the race is to rebuild social harmony in Hong Kong;
3. Carrie Lam, current chief secretary with relatively high popularity. Many believe she is Beijing's “back up plan” after the current chief executive Leung Chun Ying declared that he would not join the race;
4. John Tsang, who handed in his resignation as the finance secretary before Christmas to prepare for the election race.
The latter two are considered to be the main rivals for the race. John Tsang is nicknamed “Pringles Pizza” by netizens because of his mustache.
Here is how the race is presented in song:
有一個薯片品客 佢鍾意果兩執鬚
最叻計唔啱啲數 派錢派左去邊度
佢想去特首選戰 每一個都讚他好
有一個葉劉想鬥 民望贏硬唔洗鬥
但係中央無綠燈 無得比佢做
「林鄭係個好司長 官職畀佢更擅長」
這一個薯片品客 最終佢都無得撈
佢搵呀胡官傾訴 期待林鄭贏不到
Pringles Pizza is proud of his mustache.
He is not good at math and gives the money to the wrong place.
He wants to join the chief executive race and everyone says he is good.
Regina Ip wants to compete, but Pringles Pizza wins with his popularity.
But Beijing has not given the green light to him yet. So he cannot run.
It said, “Carrie Lam is a good chief secretary and has more experience in the government.”
Pringles Pizza lost his job.
He talked to Judge Woo and hoped that he would beat Carrie Lam in the race.