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Pakistan: Blog-o-comments

Like phoenix rising from the ashes, I return renewed, refreshed and rejuvenated into a new, enthused blogger self. Actually, that is a slight exaggeration, it is more like panic rising from a crisis, I return depleted, drained and depressed added to my existing procrastinating blogger self. Not wanting to disappoint my legion of admirers from around the world (it could happen!), I write this insightful post not just to highlight the riches from the Pakistani blogosphere but to give something back to my fans that have given me so much (anonymous insults, veiled threats and colourfully worded hate mails) over the years.

In this post, I shall be revealing my successful techniques and etiquette for commenting on blogs. But before I get into that, Glass House details the recent blatant censorship incident in Pakistan.

Confronted by the sight of thousands of Punjabis hailing the arrival of the Chief Justice apparently proved to be too much for the Establishment – Aaj, both channels of ARY and all three channels of Geo suddenly disappeared off our screens.

On reading a uniquely enjoyable and well written blog post, it is imperative that one must shower the author with praise in order to encourage the blogger to remain committed to producing excellent content. For female bloggers (between the ages of 20 to 40), I prefer to comment thus, “I love you and I think we should start a family, immediately!” For all other bloggers, I comment, “Oh, c'mon, you can do better than that!”

Teeth Maestro
, puts the blame squarely on the shoulders of MQM for the TV censorship.

For posts that one considers ‘average’, it is considered good blog manners to comment on the content and give constructive feedback to the blogger to improve his/her writing skills. I choose to be subtle when commenting on such posts; “Try a photoblog next time, Shakespeare!”

Fountainhead expertly pens his latest piece on the situation in the Middle East.

Unless pulled back, the world is now at the very brink of entering one grizzly global battle. The battle ground is the Middle East. And the two chief adversaries in this upcoming battle are the Muslims and the Western forces marshaled by the Zionist Jews.

Raza Rumi delves into Pakistan's past to highlight Kafka-esque moments in the country's history.

On occasion, one encounters a blog post that is so below par that it results in headache and nausea even upon a brief perusal. For such posts, it is still proper etiquette to point out the shortcomings to the blogger in a polite, appropriate manner. I prefer, “You are dumber than an opossum's IQ. Perhaps you should consider giving up blogging and take up a career at Fox News.”

Finally, I'd like to highlight my recent post about a Pakistani play that was banned by the government. After reading this post, the only appropriate comment you should post is, “Wow! That was such an insightful and interesting article that I'd like to immediately wire transfer large sums of money to your personal bank account.”

3 comments

  • “You are dumber than an opossum’s IQ. Perhaps you should consider giving up blogging and take up a career at Fox News.”

    Well on a serious note, I do like your style. Not too contrived, not too formal and at the same time not to boisterous either. For a boringly uptight person like myself, that’s a welcome change to come across to in my wanderings around the net.

  • Imran Raza Khan

    Pakistan is already being called as a failed state. Something urgent needs to be done by the civilian government to prevent this mishap. Have a look at what this Indian site says.
    http://www.indohistory.com/history_of_pa kistan.html

  • Imran Raza Khan

    Now if I ask you to write an article in a similar dumb fashion as you have written this, which talks about pakistan being a failed nation and criticising this link, it would be interesting to see how nicely you handle the issue. Please let me know once you complete writing it. Would be real fun to read.

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